Working on our voices in the same manner we hone our posture, body language, and physical prowess may be prudent.

If you’ve been reading along, you know the importance we place on body language. It helps our confidence and our leadership. Rarely, however, does someone walk into a room and take over without ever saying a word.

People’s voices, along with the power (or lack thereof) with which they deliver their words, can teach us a ton. Like any other attribute, we are uniquely attracted to or repelled by said voices differently.

Intuitively, the sound of another’s voice can be overwhelming, calming, energizing or draining. Like any other impression, the first one matters. We can, of course, get past our initial reaction and learn more, but we can certainly mine information immediately.

Generally, we think of voice training in terms of women’s voices. They’re too soft spoken, too high pitched. However, the opposite is equally true. We’ve all been around the big, booming voice that feels just a little too loud for the room. I had a specific teammate years ago with this characteristic. You could literally hear – and feel – him coming before he entered your clubhouse space. Whether this was by design or not, it was irritating to me.

It is undeniably true, however, that the perception of another’s voice is subjective. While that individual’s voice may have been irritating for me, it might have inspired another.

This may be influenced by evolution. In the animal kingdom, the roar, bark, or howl has a purpose. Some sound strong, others are whiny and probably designed to repel. Dogs bark often, due to their domestication, while wolves, although they can, almost never use a bark. Just like in the animal kingdom, our choice of vocalizations is determined almost exclusively by our social surroundings.

We naturally use different volumes and deliveries at different times. Sitting on my balcony having a conversation with a friend, I organically choose a calmer tone. After (or during) a workout, with my adrenaline and hormone peaking, I’m likely to subconsciously choose a much different intonation. A heated debate may bring out more alpha behavior, and the “roar” may emerge. Often times, it’s too much and I need to consciously dial it back. It depends on my audience. Like all effective communication, I need to be aware of not only what I’m saying, but how I’m saying it.

By paying attention to our tone and volume, and by tailoring it to the space and mood, we respect our teammates and loved ones while being more present and aware.

Strong mind,

Kap