Solid restaurants aren’t hard to find, but the exceptional ones identify their target market.

You know that when I travel, I use Yelp to find outstanding spots. I look for places with strong local food, good music playing at the right volume and a positive ambiance. Rosella Coffee, in San Antonio, Texas, ticked all those boxes. They serve breakfast and bring in a variety of local chefs to prepare dinner at nights. Charles Gonzalez, the proprietor, talked to me about their philosophy. He sent over a note from that night’s chef:

LocaVore specializes in working with local farmers and ranchers throughout Texas. My menu is based in seasonal availability and the menu can change from day to day. I met my pork purveyor at the farmers market when I first started the food truck business. The idea was to create dishes based on the available produce from the market. Loncitio Cartwright is the owner of Peaceful Pork, he supplies several restaurants within the San Antonio industry including Folc, and Cured. Dennis Sloan also works with Loncito and has been my butcher for the past year. He supplies whole pigs to LocaVore for all the tiki roasts I have done in the past. Dennis Sloan started practicing butchery in France.

Wow. Sensational.

But that’s simply not ample enough today. There’s a market catering to travelers like us. When we’re out there, lost in the world, we bring our laptop(s) with us everywhere. We’re not mining for establishments to socialize. We want to eat good food, drink exceptional coffee, indulge in the occasional glass of wine or scotch, have a comfortable place to sit surrounded by good vibes…and we want to be able to work. That means we need reliable wifi, and we don’t want to ask for it.

Here’s how this conversation sometimes rolls when an establishment checks all of the aforementioned boxes, sans the most critical.

Me: “Excuse me, do you have wifi?”

Host/hostess: “Ummm, not sure let me ask the (insert applicable title).”

Me: Thanks

He/she returns several minutes later.

Host/hostess: “Yes, we have wifi but it’s been spotty.”

I wait, but nothing more is forthcoming. This is where they’re supposed to tell me my next move. I get a blank stare. Ughhh.

Me: “So, what’s the network and password, just in case the spottiness has subsided?”

Host/hostess: “Hang on, let me check.”

Me: “Uhhh, Okay.”

A minute or so later.

Host/hostess: “Try this, I’m not sure if it will work (reading from a ripped business card): “Uppercase X, lower case y, Ma$alaChai with the “S” a dollar sign, 66751.”

Me: “Got it.”

I leave and never return.

The world is changing, and there’s a hole in the market that’s being filled by establishments like Rosella. Their wifi is stable, fast, and the password is clearly displayed (written in colored chalk, so you know they’re cool).

It’s not that fucking hard, folks. Have good wifi and show me how I can efficiently access it, or tell me you don’t have it so I can find somewhere else to work without wasting your time and mine.

Strong mind,

Kap