I have dedicated immense amounts of time to improving my fitness level. Nevertheless, I still occasionally bite the hook baited by lying headlines. In this particular case, the irresistible article promised a full circuit workout using only body weight.

Like most folks, I like to stroll around the web. Every day, I notice a headline or two that prompts me to click, even though I know it will be nonsense. Today’s clickbait was from Men’s Health: “The All-New Pushup Circuit That Builds Strong, Massive Shoulders.” That promise sounded great. I’d love to find a bodyweight training program that would build and maintain lean muscle tissue. It would be gratifying to deliver that program to you.

The circuit works like this: Do each exercise—the pushup, the side pushup to your right, and the side pushup to your left—for 30 seconds, and then move on to the next one. Rest 15 seconds between each exercise. That’s one round. Rest one minute, and repeat.

If this pushup circuit makes me look like Vernon Davis, I’ll do that shit twice a day. The concept is accompanied by a video of a dude doing traditional pushups, followed by pushups with his weight shifted to each side. Groundbreaking.

Workouts don’t need to be advanced to be effective. I’ve often told you that the best workout is one you will do consistently. But this one promised me huge shoulders, dammit, and I won’t be getting them by doing bodyweight pushups. Here’s why, from travelstrong.net:

Unfortunately, a lot of people associate bodyweight training with high reps and therefore believe there’s no way they could get seriously strong with bodyweight training alone. And they’d be right: simply adding more reps won’t create a significant enough overload to continually build muscle.

Exactly. This is disappointing. In a perfect world, we’d all train with our own bodyweight. There would be no equipment to buy and no gym memberships needed. I’ve been searching for science that suggests there is an alternative to heavy weight training for building lean tissue.

A man or woman venturing into the training world for the first time will likely build some mass no matter what. What I need is a program for an experienced weight lifter. You might have noticed that I’ve been somewhat dissatisfied with the 5×5 for a while. I’ve done it for years, and it’s becoming monotonous. My body’s signals are suggesting that I temporarily try a new program. Unfortunately, most of what I’m stumbling upon is poppycock.

There is some promising information out there. From the same article:

To build muscle without weights, you need to continually challenge your muscles by doing increasingly difficult bodyweight exercises – just as you would use heavier weights in the gym.

Working towards advanced exercises such as the one-armed push-up, one-armed chin-up, pistol squat, planche, l-sit and front lever will ensure that you are constantly challenged. These advanced bodyweight exercises demand high levels of full body tension that lead to huge strength gains.

While I’m crazy skeptical that anything apart from incrementally adding weight will achieve the results I desire, I’m prepared to research this further. If you see me at the park with an arm behind my back busting out pull-ups, expect a post. I’ll make sure to include pictures with that one.

Kap