There is a new workout craze taking over the trendiest hiking trails of Southern California. Folks are loading up packs with car parts and babies and walking the steepest inclines possible. From weighttraining.about.com:

Overall, carrying a heavy pack on the back brings many muscles into play, including those of the arm and shoulder that you use to sling the pack onto the back.

All the coolest celebrities are doing it, particularly the ones who are in the market for stronger, more developed muscles.

You need strong trapezius muscles, the muscles radiating out from the base of the neck. This is where the shoulder harness sits. Robust “traps” helps prevent soreness. The abdominal muscles work hard trying to stabilize that pack when you twist and turn; you need to have good strong abs. The muscles of the upper and mid back continually contract trying to stabilize the pack from slipping one way or another, especially with very heavy packs.

I don’t keep up with my celebrity news as well as I should. I learned about this new workout after hiking one of the most challenging uphill trails in the greater Los Angeles area. The first potion of the trek is a doozy. It was a slow and painful march that felt immeasurably steep. About 1000 yards into my session, the terrain began to flatten out. That’s when I saw it. A large car battery sat just off my path. At first, I was salty. I assumed someone decided to randomly dump the thing in the middle of nowhere, and that seriously freaked me out. Then I realized that nobody would carry a 50 pound object up the mammoth mountain just to dump it. Silly me.

There was but one explanation. This battery was a piece of workout equipment. The other essential piece, the backpack or carrying case, must have malfunctioned or ripped or something. The workout warrior was carrying a baby and couldn’t haul the battery back down without the pack. It was the battery or the baby.

I know what you’re thinking. Why didn’t the person go back for the battery after handing off the baby to a loved one? I thought of that. The hiker was Angelina Jolie, and she was late for The Alliance for the Lost Boys of Sudan fundraiser that evening in Beverly Hills. She weighed out (see?) her options. On balance, she would have a more substantial impact on the world if she got to the charity event sooner. Nicely played, Angelina.

Now that it’s scientifically proven that battery was training gear, we can rule out the idea that it was litter. Phew. On to the health benefits.

As a man of roughly 200 pounds, I’ll burn 838 calories climbing hills carrying 45 pounds. If I’m simply walking while carrying a small child, I’ll burn 279. I don’t have a calculator for doing both simultaneously, but damn if that number isn’t north of 1000.

Most of the time, I don’t buy into the workout of the month. This time, Angelina got me.

I need to borrow a baby,

Kap